Journal
Practice & process notes
Occasional writing on my art practice, techniques, process, and the ideas behind the work.
4 articles on oil painting
July 27, 2026
The Alchemy Of Self: Plein Air Painting In The Mountains Of Colorado
Recently I met up with an old friend in Granby, Colorado and hiked The Devil’s Thumb trail, a 7.5 mile out and back with a 2247 foot climb over rough terrain, at a starting altitude of around 9000 feet. I thought the day would be a fun proof of concept for my DIY plein air painting rig, to prove to myself that it’s a viable setup for a strenuous and difficult hike. What it turned into was the most difficult hike I’ve ever done and a proof of concept for so much more. The altitude, the heat, the weight of the gear, and the sheer elevation gain soon became major factors and about 2/3 up the ascent, in a wildfire scorched swath of dead timber and stifling heat, I was wobbly with fatigue and mentally battling through every second, focusing my entire attention on each movement of my legs, reaching deep for all the meditation techniques I’ve practiced over the years. I had many moments of doubt, some moments of frustration, a few of panic, and eventually a breakthrough of surrender to the goal. My mind became laser focused on a single point: I will not disappoint my friend or myself, I will reach the top and make the painting I planned on. All of reality, all possibilities in the entire universe shrunk down to this one specific, inevitable, unquestionable outcome. This is a conscious nonduality I’ve chased for many years making art—a flow state of pure freedom where the self is lost to the goal, and the art makes itself through the conduit of me. A willing surrender. Having this realization that surrendering my self and all its pointless fears and doubts was actually the only way I was going to reach the summit, was when I felt in stunning realtime clarity the past few years of struggle, depression, grief, and rage become compressed and dissolved by a single breath and step at a time. The future is a fantasy, the past is a memory; only this moment is real. And now this moment. This breath. This foot stepping forward. Now this one. Place foot on rock. Engage glutes, push. Breathe in, drag it deep into diaphragm, exhale slowly. Do it again. Complete this moment, survive to the next moment. After many moments the summit was reached. I laid down in the grass, with a pounding migraine and nausea, and achieved my goal of making a painting. I was too tired to stand and never used my tripod, suddenly useless weight that I had unnecessarily trudged up the mountain. No worries, my rig is still a success, viable in extreme difficulty day hikes. And most importantly, suffering was alchemized into achievement and the limitations of ego and self were transcended. The universe works as designed too. View From Devil's Thumb, oil on panel, 8 x 10 inches, 2026
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June 16, 2025
What Dreams Wither
Fresh off the easel today is this new still life, my first classical still life in years, actually--a commission for a dedicated collector of my artwork featuring items of personal significance to her. "What Dreams Wither" oil on linen panel, 12 x 16 inches, 2025 (private collection) It was great fun revisiting these techniques and some dark vanitas subject matter, which was utilized heavily in my "Blood Rituals" series from 2016-20. I consider this painting to be the newest--albeit posthumous--addition to that series. The prominent use of the color pink in this piece is symbolic of innocence, naivete, and femininity, the crumpled tissue paper evoking fragility and gifts unpacked, wrappings tossed aside. The softness of the peony and the sparkling tiara complete the feminine symbolism, which is contrasted by the masculine hardness of the dagger, knife, and marble slab upon which the scene has played out. As with other pieces in the Blood Rituals series my focus is on the aftermath of events; quiet overlooked moments and the ephemera of some unknown human activity. These objects left behind and cluttered in a corner of a cabinet or hutch have a new importance as artifacts, telling the story of innocence lost, illusions pierced by hard truths, wisdom hard-earned through suffering, childhood dreams withered in the cold autumn of adulthood. A subtle nod to Jung and the psychological archetypes is given in the upturned cranial cap, the blood the life force and animator of the self. We spill it and drink it in, and someday it will be all gone. The vanitas still life reminds us of this fleeting cycle, urging us not to lose ourselves in the decay of material pleasures and the flesh, and instead seek the ultimate truth of personal enlightenment.
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April 5, 2020
Notes & Advice 12: What To Consider When Setting Up A Still Life
Discussing some of the subtler points of still life setup with Jake Meeks of Fireside Tattoo Network and Podcast. Part of my alla prima still life painting workshop for sale on the fireside website in video module format.
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September 2, 2019
Pest
“Pest”, oil on panel, 11 x 11 inches, 2019 Here’s a silly random painting I made recently. “Pest” Oil on insect shaped panel For @christian1perez ‘s “Metamorphosis” art show at Hope Gallery in New Haven CT, September 7, 2019 What if humans are actually the cockroaches, infesting this beautiful planet and spreading disease, pollution, war, garbage, and waiting to be exterminated by an increasingly angry Mother Nature? This ridiculous painting started with that premise, or nagging question, in mind, and then just snowballed from there… Coming up with an effective composition on a laser-cut beetle shaped panel with very thin arms sticking out proved difficult, and eventually led me right back to the most obvious solution: acknowledge the shape of the panel with the image itself. Why slap a random image on a bug-shaped surface? So I slapped a bug-shaped semi-self portrait of me on a bug-shaped surface. The inspiration for the tattoo on my, uhh, its? back was an ancient Egyptian temple carving of a scarab beetle, and then I paired it with a classic traditional Americana tattoo dagger. The inspiration for the butthole and sack from the back was–ahh, actually, I’ll just stop there. Enjoy. “Pest” (detail)
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